Keeping the Romance Alive in Marriage

by Katherine Kehler

“Honor Christ by submitting to each other” (Ephesians 5:21).

Marvin and I have been married for over 47 years. We have lived, slept, worked, played, prayed, traveled and eaten together for that many years.

Marvin travels at least 30 percent of each year – probably more. When he is away, he calls me most evenings and his voice still thrills me. I still think he has the most wonderful smile in the world, a calm, gentle voice and the friendliest eyes. And I still love his touch.

What do we do to keep the romance alive in our marriage?

First I’ll tell you what he does to keep our romance alive, then I’ll tell you what I do to keep our marriage interesting and exciting.

He does and says kind things. He tells me many times a day that he loves me and that I am beautiful. He kisses and hugs me a lot. At night, because he knows I like to take a bath, the bathwater is usually in the tub and the room is nice and warm before I get to the bedroom. He often brings me flowers. He opens doors for me. When in a group meeting he winks at me. I know I am special to him and it still gives me a thrill.

He supports and affirms me in the ministry God has called me to.

What I do to keep our interest in each other?

I cook his favorite meals - especially after a trip when he has been eating in restaurants for days. I keep his clothes in A-1 condition so he is always ready to meet anyone. I tell him he is handsome and looks sharp. I take care of many of the small housekeeping details at home so he doesn’t have to concern himself with them. I affirm him in leadership abilities, his wisdom and discernment.

Some evenings when we are at home alone and watching TV or a video; I will put my head on his lap. He likes me to touch him and kiss him when we are alone.

In public places, a touch or squeeze on the arm communicates, “I love you!” without saying a word. When he is relaxing and has his feet up, I never walk by without tickling his feet.

We have fun. We laugh a lot.

We have spiritual discussions. Over breakfast we usually discuss what God has pointed out to us during our quiet times and we pray together.

We work at trying to please each other rather than insisting on having our own needs met.

Our love for each other is still growing and glowing. You see, romance doesn’t start in the bedroom; it begins first thing in the morning. The way you greet each other in the morning, how you treat and talk to each other during the day. Then when you go to bed, it is natural to want to snuggle.

Try some of these tips – maybe they will help ignite or strengthen the romance in your marriage as well.

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